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approval, to “dating a good looking bipolar woman.
approval, to “dating a good looking bipolar woman.
She’s fun to visit, great on dates and fantastic in the sack, but you don’t want to marry her.” We have read a great deal of expert analysis of Thailand’s foreign-investment climate. None of it was as efficient as that. The Poet Laureate does not hate Thailand. He loves it, helplessly, the way you love something you know is bad for you, and he will be back at the airport within the year, suitcase in hand, swearing this time is different. Species nine: The Heartbroken (the lonely one percent)
And here, at last, the rarest creature in the habitat, so rare we nearly walked past it. For every Prosecutor demanding sentence, you must scroll a long, long way to find a single foreigner who simply felt sorry for the man losing his home. One in a hundred. “Imagine an old couple who sold their house in Europe to retire here, did it with no ill intent, believing they were following a legal process.”
“Some time should be given to let them make things legal.” That is more or less the entire population of the Heartbroken, and they were swarmed in the replies within the hour, corrected, mocked, and told to read the law. The decency was there. It was simply, comprehensively, outnumbered. An interlude: the ten funniest things anyone said
Before we get serious, and we are about to, the comment section deserves a moment of pure appreciation. Sorting hundreds of comments by theme is illuminating. It also means reading, in one sitting, every single thing a few thousand foreigners felt compelled to type at 3am, and some of it is, accidentally or otherwise, magnificent. Drawn from the comment sections across this whole series, in ascending order of greatness, the ten finest contributions to the debate.
At number ten, the shortest legal opinion ever filed: a man who, beneath a long thread about leases and ownership, added only the words “Plus superficies.” No sentence. No context. Just a property-law term, dropped like a microphone, and gone.
At nine, the helpful pivot. As others despaired about seized villas, one reader offered the solution nobody had considered: “U can always buy a big boat.” Property law solved. Set sail.
At eight, the man who looked around the thread, at the lawyers being named and the structures being exposed, and observed with delight that “this comments section is a whistle blower paradise.” He was not wrong.
At seven, the gambler’s take: “Sounds like Roulette at Crown.” Paired closely with the reader who noted that “any front bar feather brain could have told him the truth,” which is either an insult or the name of a very good pub.
At six, the gloriously specific alternative. To anyone considering a Thai villa, one Englishman had counsel of crystalline clarity: “Buy a couple of terrace houses in Manchester for the same money and rent here.” You cannot argue with the maths. You can only picture the terraces.
At five, a line that has to be read twice. Amid advice about where to put your money, one commenter offered: “Juicy fruit is better. You chew it as you walk past the property.” We have thought about this for some time. We are no closer. We love it.
At four, the portmanteau brigade. A determined contingent has decided the country needs renaming, and submitted their entries: “Scamland.” “Conland.” Brief, bitter, and clearly the product of real personal journeys we will never know.
At three, the influencer of doomed advice. One man explained the entire workaround, buy it in your Thai girlfriend’s name, and then, magnificently, signed off like a lifestyle guru: “follow me for more pro tips and advice.” We sincerely hope people did.
At two, and almost the champion, our Spelling Bee returns for an encore: the grammarian in the burning building. While the thread raged about people losing their homes, one man could bear it no longer, not the injustice, but the spelling. “Lose! The word is LOSE. Loose change, loose women, loose cattle. The word you morons are struggling with is L[...]
← Back to newsShe’s fun to visit, great on dates and fantastic in the sack, but you don’t want to marry her.” We have read a great deal of expert analysis of Thailand’s foreign-investment climate. None of it was as efficient as that. The Poet Laureate does not hate Thailand. He loves it, helplessly, the way you love something you know is bad for you, and he will be back at the airport within the year, suitcase in hand, swearing this time is different. Species nine: The Heartbroken (the lonely one percent)
And here, at last, the rarest creature in the habitat, so rare we nearly walked past it. For every Prosecutor demanding sentence, you must scroll a long, long way to find a single foreigner who simply felt sorry for the man losing his home. One in a hundred. “Imagine an old couple who sold their house in Europe to retire here, did it with no ill intent, believing they were following a legal process.”
“Some time should be given to let them make things legal.” That is more or less the entire population of the Heartbroken, and they were swarmed in the replies within the hour, corrected, mocked, and told to read the law. The decency was there. It was simply, comprehensively, outnumbered. An interlude: the ten funniest things anyone said
Before we get serious, and we are about to, the comment section deserves a moment of pure appreciation. Sorting hundreds of comments by theme is illuminating. It also means reading, in one sitting, every single thing a few thousand foreigners felt compelled to type at 3am, and some of it is, accidentally or otherwise, magnificent. Drawn from the comment sections across this whole series, in ascending order of greatness, the ten finest contributions to the debate.
At number ten, the shortest legal opinion ever filed: a man who, beneath a long thread about leases and ownership, added only the words “Plus superficies.” No sentence. No context. Just a property-law term, dropped like a microphone, and gone.
At nine, the helpful pivot. As others despaired about seized villas, one reader offered the solution nobody had considered: “U can always buy a big boat.” Property law solved. Set sail.
At eight, the man who looked around the thread, at the lawyers being named and the structures being exposed, and observed with delight that “this comments section is a whistle blower paradise.” He was not wrong.
At seven, the gambler’s take: “Sounds like Roulette at Crown.” Paired closely with the reader who noted that “any front bar feather brain could have told him the truth,” which is either an insult or the name of a very good pub.
At six, the gloriously specific alternative. To anyone considering a Thai villa, one Englishman had counsel of crystalline clarity: “Buy a couple of terrace houses in Manchester for the same money and rent here.” You cannot argue with the maths. You can only picture the terraces.
At five, a line that has to be read twice. Amid advice about where to put your money, one commenter offered: “Juicy fruit is better. You chew it as you walk past the property.” We have thought about this for some time. We are no closer. We love it.
At four, the portmanteau brigade. A determined contingent has decided the country needs renaming, and submitted their entries: “Scamland.” “Conland.” Brief, bitter, and clearly the product of real personal journeys we will never know.
At three, the influencer of doomed advice. One man explained the entire workaround, buy it in your Thai girlfriend’s name, and then, magnificently, signed off like a lifestyle guru: “follow me for more pro tips and advice.” We sincerely hope people did.
At two, and almost the champion, our Spelling Bee returns for an encore: the grammarian in the burning building. While the thread raged about people losing their homes, one man could bear it no longer, not the injustice, but the spelling. “Lose! The word is LOSE. Loose change, loose women, loose cattle. The word you morons are struggling with is L[...]